Thai women are unique in comparison to other Asian women, especially if you’ve ever been to nearby countries like Vietnam, Cambodia, or the Philippines. Truth be told, dating and marrying a Thai bride will more than likely be the best and happiest decision of your life – barring you make the right choices, follow some of these tips, and use discretion.
For starters, Thai women are very traditional, and depending on where you met yours, chances are she will be against any forms of PDA (public displays of affection). Just remember – in most cases – avoiding or rejecting your kiss in public, or even holding your hand by no means she isn’t necessarily interested.
Rather, it shows that for Thais, reputation is a serious thing, and she wants to make sure you’re serious and the right guy before she goes around showing you off or vice versa. You see, Thai women are big on reputation, and given their smaller communities it isn’t hard for word to get around relatively quickly about a new boyfriend – especially if you’re a foreigner.
Now, for turning your relationship with into something more serious, getting engaged, and married is not only a little challenging, but of course also a major move. So, use your discretion, be careful, and follow these additional tips to be certain she is the one, and that you two are best for each other.
What to Avoid
This is really important, so please listen closely, and do not – under any circumstances – start showing up to dates or taking your Thai girlfriend or fiancé out and about in public in a sleeveless white t-shirt, shorts, and sandals. And while no, it’s not that you can’t be comfortable or “be yourself”, the reality is coming from a traditional culture that Thai women take great pride in their appearance, hygiene, and likewise expect their man too.
Besides, you don’t want to look like just another “run-of-the-mill” foreigner, do you? Because if so, chances are you might be treated like one – and this isn’t always a desirable situation. Especially for those that are looking for a more serious relationship, or long and meaningful life in Thailand.
Another piece of advice, while it might seem a little redundant, the truth is no matter how old, we as men can be a little inattentive or simple. So, with that being said, do not touch or play with your Thai girlfriend’s hair – especially if it’s your first date. Thai women put a lot of hard work, emery, time, and money into their hair and appearance, so playing with it unwittingly, like a toy, is not the way to go about transitioning your relationship into a marriage anytime soon.
Also, a big no-no is trying to impress your Thai girlfriend (or even Fiancé) with money, your car, job, or other financial and personal information.
So, if in the beginning of your relationship your date or Thai girlfriend frequently asks about such things, or seems peculiar in her interest in your finances, then it may be best to break away from that relationship.
Although, and as complicated as this may come off, it is indeed a double-edged sword decision to make in that situation. That is, because it is also common and possible – especially in Asian culture – for the woman to feel you out financially to judge how well of a prospective provider you would be for her and a family of your own.
So, as you can see this goes both ways and is something you’ll need to consider carefully before acting on or moving forward. Simply put, don’t show up on your first date or brag about your car, money, and other assets unless that’s what you like to do, and wish to attract the women that come along with such a lifestyle – i.e. “gold-diggers” or those that are otherwise only interested in your money. These are also avoidable women because often they may already have a Thai boyfriend, or worse, husband and children.
Separating Yourself from the Competition
Thai women are very beautiful, educated, and no doubt intelligent. So, most of them know this, which means you really want to stand apart from the “competition”, and distinctly interact with your Thai date or lover in unique ways if you wish to take things to the next level – i.e. marriage.
For starters, rather than just trying to “woo” your Thai date with money or other expensive things and dates, try to think outside the box. In other words, consider local, public, and more affordable or even free things to do together. It doesn’t make you cheap, and in reality, any good Thai woman will appreciate the opportunity to “bond” with a nice, good, and sincere foreign man.
Just know when going out and about together, that culture is extremely important to Thais, as is reputation. So, chances are if you have a drug or alcohol problem, things won’t work out. And even if they do, unless you change, when the day comes to meet her parents and friends they will most likely reject you – or otherwise not “give their approval” of you which will be a deal-breaker.
Be a gentleman, and don’t forget the values of the traditional culture of not only Thais, but also your own. Learn about Thai culture, don’t talk about sex, or be abrasive with flirting. Know when to end the date, but also how to plan a second one and take control to show confidence and genuine interest in your Thai date or lover.
Playing Hard to Get
While it’s true any woman is likely to “play hard to get” in some way or another, in reality, as adults – and as men – we can only have so much patience for this type of behavior. And, in many instances it likely just isn’t worth it – so don’t think you HAVE to tolerate it!
In reality, you are already unique and desirable as a foreigner, so don’t be afraid to draw the line or set limits. This way, you avoided being walked on or taken for granted and advantage by your Thai date or girlfriend.
Should you have the challenge, as many foreigners do, of her repeatedly requesting or insisting on bringing a friend or friends on dates with you, either draw the line after 2 dates or so, or pay the price.
While it’s true, and understandable that this is for her safety, and approval of her friends, there also has to be a point in which the two of you actually get to know each other on a personal, private level – and also to avoid wind up being the ATM for her and her friends. Ultimately, the choice is yours, just be mindful of such trends among foreigner-Thai relationships, and avoid it at all costs.
For dating and determining whether or not your Thai date or girlfriend is serious, unless you live together, have been dating longer than a year, or are engaged, then know that her showing up to dates 40 minutes late or more is both unrealistic, and unnecessary to put up with. It’ a bad habit with a lot of Thai women, and not something you are forced to tolerate unless you set yourself up to it.
If after dating for months and having an “official” relationship, yet still having her not answer the phone sometimes or she seems to be losing interest, then chances are she probably is. Remember, she is not only still a woman, but she is also a human-being and prone to imperfections, struggles, or dishonesty just as much as any other woman. Most importantly, know when to cut your Thai girlfriend or lover loose, and know that you can’t “force” true love.
Lastly, when you feel the time is right and you want to take your relationship to the next level or get married to your Thai girlfriend, you should begin discussing, asking about, and working on getting noticed, spending time with, and getting to know her family – and vice versa. This is a must, and if it doesn’t seem to be that way, then something is likely out of order, missing, or you could otherwise be (regrettably) wasting your time with your current Thai girlfriend.